The Game is Won or Lost in your Mind

You always seem to hear that line from high school coaches or in motivational sports movies.  It is perhaps a bit cliché, but we here at Seduction Wolf can’t deny the truth behind it.  It all starts with your mindset going into the field.  If you’re depressed and have a bad attitude, it’s going to show.  If you are mentally confident and feel on top of the world, then you’re going to have a good night.  A perfect example can be seen by examining the actions of my friend Jake.

mental game

Jake is a tall good looking guy, who is also in good shape.  He has a background in marketing and has a good head on his shoulders.  He has a good personality and is very pleasant and fun to be around.  He is a tiny bit shy at first, but opens up quickly (especially after a drink or two).  He is what you would classify as a “nice guy.”  Side note: I disagree with the saying “nice guys finish last,” but that’s a discussion for another time.  For now, forget that saying completely.

In most respects, you would expect Jake to be the kind of guy that girls would really like (a solid dude).  However, he has one quality that almost completely kills his game every time.  In fact, he fails even before he makes the initial approach.  In his mind, he has already LOST the second he sees an attractive woman enter the room.  He immediately thinks, “she’s out of my league, I can’t approach her.”  So after that, even if he does end up approaching her, he fails right away because he already “knows” he is going to fail (notice the quotation marks).  He “knows” that he is never going to get her.  He even says out loud that he can’t do it!  Do you see the problem there?

You see, I used to struggle a bit with the same issue.  Having a defeatist mindset causes you to over-think the approach and what you are going to say to the woman.  It makes you tense and nervous, and women can sense that.  It also takes away ALL of your confidence.  You could literally be wearing the hottest style and have a raging 8-pack, but a defeatist mindset will poison any chance you could have had with an attractive woman.

She is not out of your league, there are no leagues.  This isn’t baseball.  You are a great guy with good qualities.  You bring good things to the table.  In order to show her your good qualities, you need to see the good qualities in yourself.  It’s not about being pompous or self-centered, it’s about having a solid grasp on who you are.  You need to go into the field with a champion’s mindset; that you are going to win in the end no matter what.  Yeah, you may not succeed with every woman (it is a numbers game after all), but rejection means nothing.  There is no rejection.  There are just women who aren’t right for you, and women who are.  It’s like a puzzle; just because one piece doesn’t fit with another doesn’t mean that it should be rejected and thrown out, it just means that it was meant to fit with a different piece.  Be confident in yourself and become a winner in your mind!


Pierre VonAyre aka “The Professor”