Real Conversations with Women, Nicholas vs. Subway

Nicholas was walking into Subway because he wanted to get a chicken sub. On his way through the parking lot, he spotted a cute blonde woman in her mid-20′s with a cute black sweater walking toward Subway as well. As Nicholas was about 15 feet behind her, she opened the door to walk in and stopped holding the door open for Nicholas. Nicholas thanks her and enters Subway with her. Subway was pretty quiet. In fact, it was so quiet that it was only Nicholas and the black sweater cutie standing in line. And you know Nicholas, of course he had to say something!

Nicholas: “Hey, you are lucky you can walk around with a black sweater. At my workplace, such attire is not allowed, although ski jackets for some reason are not deemed inappropriate.” (Nicholas is wearing a ski jacket)

Carla the Subway HottieCarla: “That’s funny, where do you work?”

Nicholas: “At this totally superb facility that contains the most talented individuals one has ever observed in our modern day society. In fact, they are so good on customer excellence that you can truly have it your way. Basically I’m paraphrasing a Burger King commercial.”

Carla laughs.

Nicholas: “Hey don’t blame me, blame television propaganda.”

Carla laughs again. She tells the Subway employee, “I’ll take a six inch and a foot long.”

Nicholas: “Jeez girl, making me look bad. Somebody can eat!”

Carla laughs.

Nicholas‘ turn to order, “Hi, I’ll take a 3 inch with basic bread and lettuce.”

Carla laughs and so does the Subway worker.

Nicholas: “No, I’m serious.”

Both employee and Carla laugh again.

Nicholas sighs, “Alright, I’ll have whatever she had except in a more mediocre mortal portion. Can’t handle her Hercules diet over there.”

Both laugh again.

Nicholas: “No, I’m serious.”

Carla is laughing so hard she almost falls over. The Subway employee’s cheeks hurt from smiling and laughing so much. Remember, Nicholas is playfully taking his time because there’s no one else in line.

Nicholas to the Subway employee, “Okay, okay, do not hurt me, I know that the line is like so long there’s people camping on a hill waiting to get in. It must be the opening of Harry Potter again or something.”

Both cannot stop laughing.

Nicholas: “I’ll take a foot long wheat bread with chicken breast, banana peppers, green peppers, jalapeno, black olives, spinach, onions, lettuce, tomatoes, and pickles.”

Nicholas to the Subway employee: “Oh NOW you want me to order whatever she had! Sorry, I only order like a half-man, half-neanderthal.”

Both are laughing non-stop.

Carla: “Stop! You are so funny.”

Nicholas to the Subway employee: “You seeing this? She is like so demanding! Where is your manager?”

Both are still laughing.

Carla receives her orders and says, “You are TOO funny, by the way, I’m Carla, here’s my number.” (Hands it over)

Nicholas: “Is this your social or bank code?”

Carla laughs, “It’s my phone number!”

Nicholas: “Oh, here I thought it was something useful.” (Winks)

Nicholas receives his order, winks at the Subway employee, and walks out behind Carla before getting back in his car and leaving. That day, Nicholas enjoyed a nice foot long chicken sub. Oh and the girl handing the number over wasn’t bad either ;)